In December 2020, I formed a writing group with three classmates.
I didn’t know them well except that I loved their stories and they gave helpful feedback.
Our teacher recommended we get in a writing group,
and since I'm really good at following instructions, I reached out to make it happen.
I imagined we'd meet every other week (via Zoom) to review submissions and give our thoughts.
I guess I supposed we'd take turns talking about our work and afterward type up our recommendations,
e-mail them out and wait to talk again two weeks later.
Two of us had class together the next semester, so she was first to see a disheartening critique I received from our teacher. I was reeling and embarrassed. Being vulnerable is SO HARD!
The critique began,
"This is really pretty horrible and very sad."
I know our teacher was referring to the inciting incident and tragic events that begin my story,
but let's just say, it also summed up her "overarching comments."
And in the whole 10 pages I submitted, she didn't comment on one single thing she actually liked.
(Don't you think that's probably breaking the teaching rules?)
Within minutes, my phone dinged with a text from my new writing partner:
“Hi my friend. I just wanted you to know, I love your book.”
Right then, right there, when I was called "friend," I was pulled out of my despair.
And I discovered our writing group wouldn't just be a clinical recitation of what we liked
(first and foremost!)
and what needed work while we met for our allotted one hour.
These weren't just three random people who would be fine to work with. Nope.
We are friends.
Often texting throughout the day with life stuff that has nothing to do with writing.
But lots of times it does. Highs and lows. Confidants.
They are my best cheerleaders, teachers, mentors, comedians, therapists.
If you’re writing, get yourself people that support you. That get how hard the process is. Who will celebrate your victories and boost you up after rejections. Get yourself people who will call you friend.
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